The Weekly Pen: Poetic justice & the search for truth

MONEY
CRYPTO
BITCOIN
By the Pen

2nd week of 2023 is here and what an entry to the preceding year full of fuds, fakes, breaks, and market shakes pushing the world into a crypto winter and recession. Despite a turbulent 2022, the year 2023 is in for a good start. They say, the way the year starts is the way it ends, so let's hope for the best based on those trends. The Pen team is back, with the weekly wrap-up of all things crypto and finance sprinkled with some poetic puns and rhyming rhythm for your Sunday read.

SWISS NATIONAL BANK BIG LOSS

The SNB's loss was quite a sight, a record-breaking 14.3 billion, alright, the Swiss franc was just too strong, causing losses that couldn't be wrong, negative rates added to the plight, resulting in a franc-ing big fight. The bank might have to change its tune, and start playing the interest rate loon, instead of intervening in forex, they'll be singing a different tune.

FTX RECOVERED CAPITAL

FTX, the trading platform, faced some financial alarms. But now it's back on track, With over 5 billion in assets to stack. Their bankruptcy attorney sang with glee, "We've recovered, you can trade with ease!" No need to fear, or hold back, FTX is ready for your crypto to not get exposed to a hack (not financial advice fyi).

BITCOIN CLIMBS ABOVE $20,000

Bitcoin's back in the game, Above $20,000, it's quite a gain. It's been over two months since it's been seen, but now it's soaring like a king on a throne so serenely. This cryptocurrency is on the rise, A new high, it's no surprise. A bull run it may signify, Investors are buying, and it's worth a try (not financial advice).

MARK CUBAN AIRING DIRTY LAUNDRY

Mark Cuban warns of a crypto crash, The next implosion may be a cash bash. He says wash trading may be the root, of fraudulent activity, quite the hoot. Cuban advises you to be aware, And do your research with great care. Don't get caught in a crypto trap, Or you'll be singing the wash trading blues, and that's a fact.

BINANCE IS BLEEDING

Binance is in a dire state, Assets worth 12 billion evaporated. In less than 60 days, it's quite a shock, it's bleeding assets like a ticking clock. The cause is yet to be found, But it's clear, something's going around. Binance, the giant of crypto exchange, Is now facing a financial range. It's a tough time for sure, But hopefully, they'll find a cure.

JP MORGAN NOT PLEASED

JP Morgan's in a bit of a mess, with fake customers, Frank and Charlie, no less. It seems someone was quite sly, creating fake accounts, sigh. JP Morgan's not amused, Investigating this case, they've chosen. Frank and Charlie, who never existed, were used for illegal activities, not resisted. It's a fraud case, that's for sure, but JP Morgan will find the culprit, that's their lure.

READY TO RUN

The crypto world is on the rise, A 10 billion earthquake is a surprise. The price of Bitcoin, Ethereum, BNB, XRP, Cardano, Dogecoin, Polygon, and Solana is soaring high, like a rocket ship reaching for the sky. It's an exciting ride, for sure, and investors are feeling secure. Many are ready to run, and with the crypto market soaring, maybe it's time to join the run (not financial advice).

MILD RECESSION

Bank of America is taking heed, A mild recession, they do foresee. But they're preparing for the worst, just in case things go haywire and burst. They're making sure they're ready, for any economic changes, steady. It's better to be safe than sorry, in this economic game, it's all about being wary.

U.S. HITTING ITS DEBT LIMIT

The US is hitting its debt limit on Thursday, Yellen warns of default, it's not a good day. She advises the government to take steps, to avoid any financial mishaps. The situation is tight, that's for sure, but hopefully, they'll find a cure. The US is in a tricky spot, but hopefully, they'll sort it out, and not get caught.

WHO BAILED OUT SBF

Media outlets are on the hunt, to find out who bailed out Sam Bankman-Fried's front. Bloomberg, WSJ, and CoinDesk are all seeking to know, with no time to rest. It's a mystery, that's for sure, who came to the rescue, that's the lure. But one thing is certain, the truth will surface, with a bit of persistence.

CREDIT SUISSE TO CUT 10% OF EUROPEAN INVESTMENT BANKERS

Credit Suisse is making cuts, 10% European investment bankers are out of luck. They'll be losing their jobs, it's true, As the bank streamlines its crew. It's a cost-saving measure, that's clear, But for those affected, it's a career fear. Credit Suisse is making a change, To keep its business within a financial range.

TESLA CUT PRICES

Tesla's cutting prices, it's true, but some buyers won't get the EV tax credit too. It's a change in policy, that's clear, Affecting buyers, it's not a welcome gear. The credit won't apply to all, as the government sets a limit, that's the call. Tesla's still a great buy, but the tax credit's no longer on the fly.

CROSSOVER HEDGE FUND LOST BIG IN 2022

Crossover hedge funds had a rough ride, lost big in 2022, and they couldn't hide. But that's not stopping them, it's clear, New funds are launching in 2023, and that's a new venture. Despite the losses, they're not done, Investors still see potential, they're not outrun. It's a risky move, that's for sure, But crossover hedge funds are still looking for a cure.

Till we yield again

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